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July 25, 2015.

Q: My real problem is i cant have peace with my appearance. i cant love that and i often hate it. im short and fat. actually the real problem is my height i cant accept it. and you know it is more 20 years that i practice alot of cults of mysticism and spirituality. im Iranian and in my country there is a rich culture of spirituality. i started with them. then i read kastaneda books and i fell in love with toltec culture and i practice that for some years. i reviewed my life alot of time and i found all the memory and events that led me to hate my appearance. i did alot of Indian version too. i meditate i do yoga, chakra therapy and every thing that you can imagine. i took a lot of courses and did alot of positive thinking and i even practiced the cults in my country that try to remove inorganic being from people. through years i had alot of success in alot of other things in spirituality i even found alot of miraculous power in me. like healing and alot of absurd powers like fortunetelling or reading people and alot more. but i couldn't accept my height. i even started to grow myself by intent and it was unsuccessful. through these years i helped alot of people to accept themselves, to grow themselves, to change their life and .... but in reality i couldnt do anything good for myself. one day one of my spiritual freinds who is good teacher of spirituality told me metaphorically that you can spin the wheel of fortune for others but it doesn't matter because you cant do anything for yourself. and he was right. so i want to know what should i do to accept my appearance? i really suffer from that.

again thank you and god bless you
sorry for my english that is not my first or second language.

 

A: Thank you for sharing your deepest emotional pain with me.  It takes courage and I appreciate it so I am going to share my deepest truth with you.

You are not your body or your mind that is judging you.  You are blessed to be living in your body which is your temple, your pet, your conditioned and obedient body that listens and feels every experience you've ever had. Please notice that all of your feelings are felt inside your body.  How sad you must feel inside since you have always been denying and rejecting your body, your self.  Just look at how many things you've done in your search of self love and self improvement. Your judgment of your physical appearance has been the driving force pushing you in search and growth.  This has been the gift of it for you. But, in every case, you've missed the key that can set you free.
The Truth……..what's so is the physical of anyone and anything is only a representation of a construct of what we call ourselves.  The truth is your body is dead without the Life force that you are and when you leave your body in death, it will fall back to the earth because the truth of what you are, the force of life, is what gives it life. How important is your height when your Presence, the Oneness of life, is the truth of what you are? Your suffering comes from your own mind's judgment. Only the ego hurts because the real you is Love and Light and Love and Light never hurts. Stop abusing your body with your judgment and honor it, love it.  It has been the tool through which you have experienced your life. Have gratitude and thanks and love for it's service.
Blessings to you,
Gaya